S06E04
Summary * Starfleet Academy Commandant Selin is unimpressed with his brother Satlek's latest posting... hosting the Federation Song Contest. * The crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise-F greet the arriving administrators and performers, including: ** The President of the Federation Song Contest, a Trill who thanks the Enterprise for offering an alternate venue now that the political situation on Vulcan has proven complicated. ** Logan, a Vulcan raised on Earth and famous for commentating on the show with his dry wit and dry martini. ** Gholos, a gas-based life-form who travels in a container and has a human translator. ** Ang'Via, a sturdy Klingon balladeer/rapper who takes an immediate liking to Captain Satlek. ** The Starfleet attaché for the event, Commander L'Leth... and her young assistant Stefan with whom she is sharing quarters. * Jaheem Soto starts a training program in the holodeck, trying to escort several crew-members through a jungle to rescue a downed Romulan warp shuttle. * Gholos' translator has a new reason to complain - an error in the life support system almost changes his room back to Federation standard, an event he suggests is either Federation incompetence or Klingon sabotage. * A Senior Officer Conference is interrupted by Ang'Via, who demands as the highest ranking officer present Satlek must take her for dinner before the show. * Kestra tries to help Arvind solve the mystery of the environmental malfunction before the show starts... and realise that the only way to do it would have been inside the room, so the translator must have tampered with the system. * A site to site transport drops Kestra and Arvind just to the back and side of the stage, causing #leftcrew to trend on the GCN. * Arvind tries to sneak under the stage to scan Gholos' containment unit and confirms it is safe... then accidentally finds himself visible again when the stage rises from the floor. * Soto finishes the training program but he is hampered by simulations of Kestra, Gustafsson, Ramsbottom and Ireland. * Ang'Via claims Starfleet are showing bias and demands a Starfleet officer must emerge from under her dress: L'Leth says no and is forced to use her nerve pinch to subdue her when she refuses to be quiet. * Satlek is confronted by the Eurovision PResident... who thanks Starfleet for getting into the spirit of the event and requests if more officers would be willing to make comedic cameos. * Kestra mind-melds with Gholos and discovers he has in fact been trying to tell us, through his natural colour-changing communication, that his translator had gone rogue and needs to be arrested. * L'Leth departs the ship, Satlek doing his best to avoid seeing her off and commenting on how good it is that "She no longer has that tragic relationship with Raoul" * Ang'Via, having won the contest, advises the crew that Qo'Nos only agreed to take part in the contest but not to host it if they won so they will be holding next year's contest at a neutral venue... and she hopes that the ship of sexy Captain Satlek will be used. ** As she beams away and the thought of going through this all again occurs, Satlek says: "...I hope the Mirror Universe invade." Details * First appearance of Security Ensign Kelly Ireland; JAG Paralegal Ensign Stefan Newton; Klingon musician Ang'Via and gaseous life-form Gholos with his human cybernetically-enhanced translator. * Arvind Gustafsson reveals himself to be a huge fan of the Federation Song Contest for years. * L'Leth implies to Kestra that she has a sexual relationship with Stefan: that the distance and lack of physicality she has with Captain Satlek necessitates her having some sort of alternate outlet for her womanly needs. * Ensign Stefan Newton did not realise that L'Leth was married, nor that her husband was a Starfleet captain. * Gholos' natural habitat has an atmosphere mixture of 60% Methane, 30% Hydrogen with trace elements including Argon. * Gholos in his natural form is teal but colour changes to communicate. Purple and brown scintillation roughly translates as "Help, my translator has gone rogue."